Ah. The time has come at last. With the sweet goodbye kiss of the Hot Girl Quarantine Summer, our tan lines begin to fade and our minds go languid with thoughts of cinnamon and clove. Folks, freshly spent from your summers of slut-dom, lay down your SunBum and adjust your VSCO to warmer tones, for Mother Nature hath decreed…
Christian Girl Autumn is upon us.
As the Boomers would say, the “internet age” has sparked a phenomena of seasonal mascots to match our moods. I have to say, Christian Girl Autumn was new to me this September. Scrolling through endless Draco fanfic and that Vintage Acting Challenge guy on my TikTok For You Page, she appeared, clad in her polyester armor and booties, orange acrylics clenched around her weapon of choice: the Starbucks Pumpkin Spice Latte.Yes, you’ve seen her too, I’m sure of it. The stock photos that seem to hold the key to World Peace, the promise of a cozy autumnal hibernation, curled up on your couch reading Red, White, and Royal Blue and watching SNL.
My first reaction? Dig out those knee-high combat boots from my middle school Hunger Games days and raid the Target Halloween section. My second reaction: why Christian Girl Autumn? After all, the seasons are secular. So I did a quick google search to find out. Turns out the meme was originally spawned by an NYC college student poking fun at the Martha Stewart esc stereotypes that fill Better Homes and Gardens during the autumnal months. So let’s be clear: Christian Girl Autumn has nothing to do with Christianity. It’s completely satirical, a spin on a stereotype. And I would argue, it is absolutely for everyone.
Because friends, how I see it: Christian Girl Autumn is not an exclusive mold we must conform to. No, she’s a state of mind, and way of being that transcends our differences, and lends herself to all of our unique expressions and personal identities. Whether you're reading your Bible or your Tarot Cards, the important thing is that you're taking time to reflect, to surround yourself with comfort. You see, folks, Christian Girl Autumn represents a mental escape, an inner peace. We hide our woes under cable knit, and ward off the bad vibes with Pumpkin Spice Febreeze, and if none of that works, if in the end we get to November, or January and everything outside our frosted windows is still so very bad, well, at least we’ll still have all the pumpkin BS we baked.
And denial is sweet isn't it?
No, only kidding. We can’t ignore what’s going on around us. We can’t stick our head in our artisanal sourdough starters and block out reality. Because that’s more privileged than our Pumpkin Spice Latte addiction. It is incredibly wrong to think that simply because we want to, we can stop being cognizant of our surroundings, stop working to make things better. But we can remember that all of us are deserving of a breath, especially those of us who’s mental health has been tossed into a blender by an isolating quarantine, by staying at home, by the political atmosphere, by attacks on our loved ones or our own existence and autonomy.
So whether or not you choose to clad yourself in plaid and polyester at the pumpkin patch, read up on witchcraft and Fall DIY projects, or even just throw on a pair of Halloween fuzzy socks and drink hot tea, you have a right to reclaim the balance you’ve lost, to be hopeful. Not ignorant, not complacent, not delusional, but hopeful. Because we’re all dealing with a lot right now. And really, I think we’re all looking for a sign from the world that things will get better. And that’s what autumn is, what the Christian Girl Autumn meme holds. It's feeling cozy and safe and letting the leaves change as the world takes stock of what it has and lets go of what's dead and weighing us down. It is progress. It is respecting your mental health and your needs. So go ahead, and Hocus Pocus your troubles away for a bit. Recharge this Christian Girl Autumn, and celebrate however you need to in order to find your hopeful spirit again. Because when it's all over, we’re going to need you at your best to put all those infographic sentiments you’ve been reposting into practice. To rake away the leaves.
Happy Christian Girl Autumn lovelies, try to stay healthy.